Friday, July 31, 2009

Gotta Be A Japanese Thing

From the UK Times Online:

After circling Earth 2,208 times and enduring numerous near misses with speeding space junk, Koichi Wakata could be described as the kind of person who flies by the seat of his pants. But the Japanese astronaut proved during his 138 days in space that he is not the kind of person to kick up a stink about things.

What follows is the sort of revelation that I could have lived without.

As the space shuttle Endeavour prepared to return to Earth yesterday, bringing Mr Wakata home from the International Space Station, where he has been since March, he revealed that he had been wearing the same pair of prototype pants for a month, all in the name of science.

Too much information. I mean, really. Can you imagine being cooped up in a big metal coffin a few hundred miles above the earth with a guy that you know is shitting himself two, three, four times a day?
If Mr Wakata’s colleagues noticed that he had been skimping on his laundry, they were polite enough not to let on — and he refrained from bringing it up in conversation. “I haven’t talked about this underwear to my crew members,” he said during a pre-landing press briefing.
A month, a whole frapping month. Didn't anyone notice that his ass was six times normal size? I bet they started calling him Mr. Wakaka once they found out what he was up to.

Mr Wakata, 46, ate a number of curries in space, along with Japanese-style dishes such as salmon rice balls. He said that upon his return to Earth he looked forward to eating fresh sushi and cold noodles and taking a hot shower.

A hot shower, a shovel and a shave...

When Ya Really Need Help...

One thing about a good host is that he tries to make his guests as comfortable as possible. He cares for their needs and sees to their welfare to the best of his ability. Except when you are a former community organizer I guess. Then you expect other people in the community to fulfill your duties.

Now I don't think Sgt. Crowley should have gone to the White House. He should have let Obongo and Skippy stew in their own juices. But Sgt. Crowley is a class act. It shows in his appearances before the camera and I have the feeling that it also shows in his personal life when he is not in the public view.

Look at the following photograph; you'll see someone who obviously needs a hand and two strong, able-bodied men who are each capable of rendering assistance. Guess who is doing the assisting?

When you need someone to jerk you off - call a community organizer.

When you need help - call a cop!

Call ACORN for one, 911 for the other.

Coming Soon To A Gov't Hospital Near You

After reading the following article, I recalled the circumstances that a cop had to face over twenty years ago. He needed specialized surgery that was not available locally to correct a medical condition he suffered from. So he went to NYC to have the work done. After his surgery, he was horrified at the lack of nursing care that he received from union nurses. He ended up hiring private nurses to take care of him in the hospital for several days until he recovered enough to return home. His impression of the union nurses was extraordinarily bad; "lazy, incompetent fat bitches" was the kindest thing he had to say about them.

Now for the horror story about unions in public hospitals that lead me to remember the prior story.

Richard Raulston was injured in an auto accident in NYC back in 1993. His kidneys were lacerated and his hip broken. To his "ever lasting regret" he was taken to a NYC run public hospital for treatment. He delivers the following narrative of public health care.

The hospital was undoubtedly understaffed and overwhelmed. But that situation was made much worse by a nursing staff of indifferent, bloody-minded, time-serving union hacks. During the next eight nights, I did encounter two or three hard-working nurses trying to help patients as much as they could, but they were a tiny minority.

I waited outside the emergency room for some hours until someone complained about the large pool of blood accumulating beneath my gurney. I required many hours of surgery to repair blood vessels, then tissue, then skin. Afterward I complained of pain in my hip, and the surgeon asked the nurse to bring a painkiller for my IV. After 30 minutes, he asked the nurse about it, and she said she could not "push it in" (to the IV bag). The surgeon responded, "Then tell me that, don't just walk away." The head of the ER later explained that the union agreement did not permit nurses to push other medications into IV bags.

It got worse. Read the entire article to get a sense of where Obama, Pelosi and Reid and the rest of the liberal Democrats are taking us.

Today I am suspicious when a union for nurses tirelessly advocates complete government control of all medical care. Why do nurses' unions fight so hard to destroy private insurance? Because they want to place one union noose around the neck of all health care in the country. That requires the destruction of the rights of insurance company investors, employees and policyholders. And for that they would have to establish a spoils system with politicians they can control. In California, they already have just that, with the help of union leaders for teachers, prison guards and others. Any medical system they impose will primarily serve that spoils system, not doctors or their patients.

I am sure many others have had more horrific experiences, and I am much better now. But what lingers most from my misery at that time was my realization and fear that Hillary Clinton was trying to create a medical system that would perform like hospitals run by New York City . I now fear that President Barack Obama is
trying to do the same thing. We must not let that happen.

Congressmen are leaving for their August break and I hope the pressure doesn't let up on them. Get in their face. Do not let them rest. If they push this disaster through we'll all be at the mercy of union thugs in Stalinist medical care facilities.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Gunga Dim

Dan Rather is pitching for a journalistic stimulus package to help the news industry keep its head above water. Kind of a funny analogy when you consider that with all the major news outlets in this country, it is still a virtual desert regarding unbiased, fact-based reporting.

“A truly free and independent press is the red, beating heart of democracy and freedom. This is not something just for journalists to be concerned about, and the loss of jobs and the loss of newspapers, and the diminution of the American press’ traditional role of being the watchdog on power. This is something every citizen should be concerned about,” said Rather.

Many, many citizens are concerned Gunga, and that's why they stopped listening to the biased liberal advocacy of you and your cohorts. Other sources cite the loss of thousands of jobs in newsrooms all over the country due to loss of revenue.

The free press, as established by the First Amendment to the Constitution, ought to operate as a public trust, not solely as a money-making endeavor, Rather argued, and it’s time the government make an effort to ensure the survival of the free press. If not the government, he suggested, then an organization like the Carnegie Foundation should take it on. Without action, he predicted, America will lose its independent media.

America lost its independant media over twenty years ago Gunga. Making the press a public trust will result in the same end product as every other government intervention. Bloated, over paid, underworked bureaucrats more interested in obtaining personal advantage than public service will determine what we hear.

Besides, why bother with the effort of taking the media over by fiat when they already surrendered on their own years ago? Instead of government workers, they should all become employees of the DNC.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Best Buds Forever

Some former Best Buds.
Two Democratic Senators continue to find their actions under scrutiny for receiving special low interest loans from their former best buds at the Countrywide Financial Corp.

Sen. Chris Dodd (D. - Hell)and Sen. Kent Conrad (D. - Oblivion) both denied knowing that they were getting preferential treatment at special VIP loan rates, but a former bank official had something else to say about that.

Robert Feinberg, who worked in the VIP section of Countrywide Financial Corp., testified about the loan terms before the Senate Ethics Committee, and provided the same information in an interview with Republican investigators of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee. He could be prosecuted for making false statements.

Both senators have said that at the time the mortgages were being written they didn't know they were getting unique deals from Countrywide, a company that lost billions of dollars on bad loans and since has been purchased by Bank of America.

Dodd and Conrad participated in a program known as "Friends of Angelo", named after Angelo Mozilo, the former CEO of Countrywide. Friends of Angelo got special treatment because they were, ahhhh, special.

I would like them to become familar with another program called "Friends of Bubba." Bubba is currently doing 12 to 17 at Joliet for male rape. Bubba very much wants to be their new Best Buddy. Especially during Happy Happy Good Fun Shower Time. Bubba wll bring the soap.

New Best Buds Forever.
Sgt. Crowley, Skippy Gates and Obongo the Circus President are soon to be BBF. This Thursday they will all get together and sit around the White House picnic table to share manly talk over brewskis.

Gibbs: "I wouldn't call it the beer fest. . . I know I'm usually the one who makes the jokes in here. I think it's a fairly serious picture."

It's hard to know what's the standard for serious though. Minutes earlier Gibbs had made the scheduled 6 p.m. gathering sound like mostly a photo-op.

It's to be held at "the picnic table out back" of the White House, weather permitting. "There's no formal agenda other than cold beer," he's quipped. Gibbs also said the idea was for the men (Gates and Obama already are friends) to "get to know each other and step back from the circumstances that brought everybody together."

How in the world any intelligent, self-respecting cop can sit down with these two posers is beyond me. Sgt. Crowley must realize that this is not an opportunity for him to share the richness of his law enforcement experiences. Obongo and his long time BBF Skippy will use this any way they can to their own advantage. Obongo is still looking for pay back after being forced to pay all those Cambridge PD parking tickets. He'll probably have the Capitol Police bag Crowley for DWI as he drives away.

This is nothing but a cover-your-ass-we-screwed-up-big-time-and-pissed-off-a-whole-buncha-honkys Chicago Fest. Don't look for Ooompah bands. Whatever comes out of this exercise in futility will do nothing to further the interests of public safety or German drinking music.

Monday, July 27, 2009

I'm Feeling Kinda Blue

That's what you might say if new medical research pans out. According to National Geographic News, the picture below may be a harbinger of spinal cord/nerve damage treatment. Yeah, yeah, there's unanticipated side effects.

Fifteen minutes after researchers intentionally paralyzed this rat by dropping a weight on its back, they injected the rodent with Brilliant Blue G dye, a derivative of common food coloring Blue Number One.

Now that really sounds cold man. One minute you're running through a maze - working your little furry ass off for a spot of cheese - and the next thing you know... WHAM!

The dye reduced inflammation of the spinal cord, which allowed the rats to take clumsy steps--but not walk--within weeks, a new study says. In both rats and people, secondary inflammation following spinal cord trauma causes more lasting damage than the initial injury: Swelling sparks a small "stroke," which stops blood flow and eventually kills off the surrounding tissue.

Obviously there may be something to this blue dye treatment. Unfortunately the article does not address whether any rats recovered from similar injuries without blue dye injections or other forms of treatment.

Other than blue skin and eyes, "we can find no clinical effect on the rat," said Maiken Nedergaard, a neuroscientist at the University of Rochester Medical
Center in Rochester, New York.

Hmmmmm. No clinical effect. Even without nerve damage, mix this stuff with Viagra and I'll give it a play. Get a job with the Blue Men Group. Call it the Real Happy Old Blue Men Group.

Barack Obama ‘Acting Stupidly’

Barack Obama ‘Acting Stupidly’
By Doug Patton
July 27, 2009

Proving once again how desperately he needs a teleprompter to avoid inserting his size 12 oxfords into his mouth, Barack Obama couldn’t resist commenting on what should have remained a local issue, and, in so doing, proved himself every bit as arrogant as the overpaid, tenured twit he was defending. I refer, of course, to the case of the president’s good friend, elitist Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates, Jr., who turned a routine police call to his home into an ugly racial incident. This was followed by a totally inappropriate comment from the President of the United States when he told the press that the police had “acted stupidly.”

Since then, it has become obvious that is was Barack Obama who “acted stupidly.”

Regardless of the color of your skin, what is the appropriate response when your neighbor calls 911 after seeing someone trying to break into your home and it turns out to be you? Embarrassment? An apology to the officers for wasting their valuable time? Perhaps a feeling of gratitude and a desire to thank the neighbor for being so vigilant? Professor Gates apparently felt none of these emotions. Instead, he went straight for the race card because, you see, he is black and the police officer who confronted him is white. Ergo, there must be discrimination involved.

There was, indeed, discrimination involved, but it had to do with class, not race. A wealthy Harvard professor was belligerent, insulting and unruly because a working class cop dared to confront him in the line of duty. Then, after admitting he really didn’t know all the facts in the case, the president told the press and the nation that the police “acted stupidly.”

The year is 2009, not 1959. Do Gates and the president realize how ridiculous it sounds when a man is asked by a police officer to do something and he replies with the question, “Why, because I’m a black man in America”? America has bent over backward to get past our racial history. More than half a million men died fighting a Civil War that ended slavery. The Constitution was amended, statutes were adopted and the authority of individual states was overridden by the federal government when local officials refused to abide by those laws. As pundit George Will has pointed out, Cambridge, Massachusetts, is a city governed by a black mayor in a state with a black governor in a country with a black president! Can we finally get past the race baiting?

Professor Gates has stated that he will “accept” an apology from Sgt. James Crowley, the veteran police officer who was maligned by Gates and the president. How benevolent! Crowley, to his credit, has said that an apology will not be forthcoming because he has done nothing wrong.

Meanwhile, even though the president seemed at a loss to understand why most of the country disapproved of his comments, he finally admitted that he could have “calibrated” his words differently, whatever that means. By then, he had spoken on the phone with the police officer he had insulted and assured us that they are going to have a beer together at the White House. Isn’t that nice?

North Korea is threatening to nuke us the moment they can figure out how to shoot a missile straight. Iran also wants to destroy us. Osama bin Laden is still on the loose. Unemployment is in double digits, or soon will be. Tax dollars are being squandered that our grandchildren haven’t even earned yet. And Barack Obama is going to have a beer with a cop and a college professor at the White House. Does this man even understand his job? He seems to think he was elected to be our moralizer-in-chief.

After a mere six months in office, the American people are seeing the real Barack Obama. The huckster who sold us a line of socialist snake oil disguised as magic elixir is starting to show his true colors. What we witnessed at the president’s press conference is the community organizer who spent most of his adult life sitting under the tutelage of an America-hating bigot masquerading as a Christian minister. Look for him to continue “acting stupidly.”
© 2009 by Doug Patton
Doug Patton is a freelance columnist who has served as a speech writer and public policy advisor for conservative candidates and elected officials. Since 2001, his work has appeared in newspapers across the country and on various Internet web sites. Readers can access the entire archives of Doug’s columns at, where he serves as a senior writer and state editor. His e-mail address is

The New Engrish

In order to continue getting-by in America (our home land), we all need to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to understand the term "TENJOOBERRYMUDS".

With a little patience, you'll be able to fit right in.
Now, here goes...

The following is a telephone exchange between maybe you as a hotel guest and call room-service somewhere in the good old U S A today......

Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees."
Guest : "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

Room Service: " Rye . Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"
Guest: "Uh.... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs."

Room Service: "Ow July den?"
Guest: ".....What??"

Room Service: "Ow July den?!?... pryed, boyud, poochd?"
Guest: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. scrambled, please."

Room Service: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"
Guest: "Crisp will be fine."

Room Service: "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"
Guest: "What?"

Room Service: "An toes. July Sahn toes?"
Guest: "I.... don't think so."

RoomService: "No? Judo wan sahn toes???"
Guest: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."

RoomService: "Toes! Toes!...Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"
Guest: "Oh, English muffin!!! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'... Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RoomService: "We bodder?"
Guest: "No, just put the bodder on the side."

RoomService: "Wad?!?"
Guest: "I mean butter... just put the butter on the side."

RoomService: "Copy?"
Guest: "Excuse me?"

RoomService: "Copy...tea..meel?"
Guest: "Yes. Coffee, please... and that's everything."

RoomService: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy ... rye??"
Guest: "Whatever you say."

RoomService: "Tenjooberrymuds."
Guest: "You're welcome"

Remember I said "By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TENJOOBERRYMUDS' "......and you do, don't you!

A big H/T to Judge Al (retired cop).

Saturday, July 25, 2009

A Teachable Moment


MENE, MENE, TEKEL, UPHARSIN - that is the mysterious handwriting on the wall that caused Babylonian King Belshazzar's knees to knock together so badly that he sent servants to immediately bring Daniel to him for a translation (Book of Daniel, Chapter 5).

Harvard Professor Skippy Gates has also seen the handwritting on the wall in the form of 911 tapes that captured his cultured Harvard tones cussing out Sgt. Crowley who was trying to establish Skippy's ID so he could leave the premises. Skippy's knows what is on those tapes - he realizes that he should move on. As Skippy is a scholar he didn't even need the services of an interpretor.

Harvard scholar Henry Louis Gates Jr. says he is ready to move on from his arrest by a white police officer, hoping to use the encounter to improve fairness in the criminal justice system and saying "in the end, this is not about me at all."

Ohhhhhhh yes it was. Look at Skippy "Screaming Mad" Gates in this picture as he is escorted from the Front Porch of Shame.
Nope, not about me. Not here. Not now. This is all about a teachable moment and it's all on the tapes. Trust me. I was just teaching that cracker bastard Sgt. Crowley about inter-racial relationships and building bridges between our cultures. Really.

After a phone call from President Barack Obama urging calm in the aftermath of his arrest last week, the black professor said he would accept Obama's invitation to the White House for a beer with him and Cambridge Police Sgt. James Crowley.

In a statement posted Friday on The Root, a Web site Gates oversees, the scholar said he told Obama he'd be happy to meet with Crowley, whom Gates had accused of racial profiling.

As President Nixon found out, there is nothing like a taped conversation to bring a man to his senses. Of course Skippy credits the Magic Negro for his new found congenial attitude.

It was a marked change in tone for Gates, 58, who in the days following his arrest gathered up his legal team and said he was contemplating a lawsuit. He even vowed to make a documentary on his arrest to tie into a larger project about racial profiling.

In an e-mail to the Boston Globe late Friday, he said: "It is time for all of us to move on, and to assess what we can learn from this experience."

Gates did not immediately return phone calls and e-mails to the Associated Press on Saturday.

In LibrulSpeak, "move on" means "my ass is hanging out." He didn't need an interpretor for those tapes, but his legal team probably advised him of his exposure to other consequences if he did not back off on his rheotric. You see, in the real world where Harvard University can't armor plate your ass, you'd better listen to the pros.

Go figure - Sgt. Crowley is also contemplating a lawsuit for libel against Skippy. I would love to hear those tapes.

I wonder how much political pressure is being brought to bear on the Cambridge PD to keep those tapes out of public scrutiny?

Democratic Rap

I like big budgets and I cannot lie
You Conservatives can't deny
That when a bill walks in that some homeys embrace
And you know there's money to waste
You get sprung, wanna show you're tough
'Cause you know how to stuff
Deep in the bill where no one sees
Cramming that pork as hard as you please
Keeping the taxpayers on their knees
Oh listen, I really feel your pain
All this spending's insane
The CBO tried to warn me
But health care got me so horny
We grab twenty percent of the economy
Gonna fall to socialist ideology
Obama .... gonna cure yo momma
But we gotta get past this drama
Blue Dogs don't mean nuthin' to me
Slow and easy is their plea
Hear them screaming on TV
Gotta move! Gotta go fast!
Opportunity just won't last!
Rating are down neath fiddy percent
Shit like that don't pay the rent.
We can't shove this through without consent.
Obama got jack!
There's no turning back! Conservatives on attack!
All this spending is out of whack!
We'll all end up living in shacks!
Eating hard tack!
Get this Country back on the right track!

From Now On it's the FNN

If a true conservative was elected President last year instead of the current poser and he proceded to make the same mess of things, the mainstream media would be having a shit hemorrhage over all the gaffs, lies, blunders, lies, miscues, lies, miscalibrations and general incompetence that we have witnessed thus far.

Instead, we get the MSM changing Obama's diaper every time he messes himself and wiping his little poopy ass for him. Oh he's so cute, little poopy Barakster! Oh! Oh! Look at him shit on the Constitution! He's soooo preciousssssssssssssssss!

From now on I will reference the MSM as the FNN - the Fecal Network News.

"All the Shit That Ain't Fit To Print."
"We Wipe Obama's Ass So You Don't Have To."
"If It Lies, It Flies."

Just Stuff

Health Care? Health Care? We Don Got To Take No Steeeenking Health Care!
Texas Governor Rick Perry has dropped the H-bomb. He stated that "Texas and a "number" of states might resist the federal health mandate" in order to protect states rights under the 10th Amendment of the Constitution. So far thirty-seven state legislatures s have passed resolutions Take your health care and shove it.

And What Crawled Up Her Ass?
A potty-mouthed Miami Herald reporter has had a sexual harassment charge lodged against her by by a US Navy Commander for foul sexual inferences made in front of witnesses. Part of the complaint states:

To me, in front of another journalist with reference to why 9/11 co-defendant Mustafa Al Hawsawi was seated on a pillow in court:

"Have you ever had a red hot poker shoved up your a**? Have you ever had a broomstick shoved up your a**? Have you ever had anything in your a**? How would you know how it feels if it never happened to you? Admit it, you liked it? No wonder why you like to stay in South Beach on your Miami visits."

Seems like Ms. Rosenberg needs a bar of soap inserted in an orifice located above her waist.

Mayday! Mayday!
From Mayday is an emergency code word used internationally as a distress signal in voice procedure radio communications. [It derives from the French venez 'm'aider, meaning 'come help me'.] From the UK's Telegraph:

Today’s Rasmussen Presidential Tracking survey will have hit the poll-obsessed Obama White House like a bullet train at full speed. For the first time, Barack Obama’s approval rating has fallen below 50 per cent among likely voters. 51 per cent of Americans now disapprove of the president, with 38 per cent strongly disapproving. The poll also reveals that 53 per cent oppose the president’s hugely controversial congressional health care reform package, and a mere 31 per cent believe America as a country is heading in the right direction under Obama’s leadership.

Looks like the turkey buzzards are circling, preparing to come home to feast on the Obama administration carcass. Obama's socialist main course was killed by a nasty health care glaze compounded by a side dish of racist anti-police au gratin. Bon Appetit!

Friday, July 24, 2009


Things got interesting today as the Obama White House proved to the nation that no adults are in charge.

First, this morning White House spokesman Robert Gibbs managed to cram both feet in his piehole at the same time by announcing that:

"I think the Fraternal Order of Police endorsed McCain," Gibbs fired back at reporters, referring to Obama's Republican opponent in the 2008 election. "If I'm not mistaken."

This was said in response to the stream of furious criticism directed at the White House by national police unions. Everything is political to Mr. Gibbs. His shallow assessment of police officers' outrage at Obama's kneejerk reaction does not do him credit.

Someone with a clue (not Gibbs) obviously got to Obama and made him realize that he has no idea what he is talking about in regard to Professor Gates' Operation Front Porch Cluster and he is managing to piss off about half a million people who carry firearms for a living.

But he still managed to screw it up. Instead of just apologizing to Sgt. Crowley and the Cambridge Police Department for speaking stupidly, Obama miscalibrated his piehole and threw it into mumble mode.

"In my choice of words, I unfortunately gave the impression that I was maligning the Cambridge Police Department or Sergeant Crowley specifically," Obama said, walking back his sharpest criticism.

That was not an impression dumbass. Vegas entertainers do impressions. Rich Little, Frank Caliendo and Kevin Pollack did impressions.

You made a declarative statement that the "Cambridge Police acted stupidly" and you said it in front of the press corps. Declarative statement are the sort of things that are introduced as evidence in a courtroom proceding. Impressions, being subjective, are specifically precluded.
But, the president said: "I continue to believe, based on what I have heard, that there was an overreaction in pulling Prof. Gates out of his home and to the station. I also continue to believe, based on what I heard, that Prof. Gates probably overreacted as well."

In the fantasy movie Hook, Robin Willliams (Peter Pan) tells Julia Roberts (Tinkerbell) that he believes. Today Obama claps his hands and informs us that he too believes in pixies/fairies and canards.

A black Police Sergeant who was on the scene with Sgt. Crowley supports Crowley's actions and says that Gates was acting strangely, from the Chicago Tribune:

A black police officer who was at Henry Louis Gates Jr.'s home when the black Harvard scholar was arrested says he fully supports how his white fellow officer handled the situation.

Sgt. Leon Lashley says Gates was probably tired and surprised when Sgt. James Crowley demanded identification from him as officers investigated a report of a burglary. Lashley says Gates' reaction to Crowley was "a little bit stranger than it should have been."

Asked if Gates should have been arrested, Lashley said supported Crowley "100 percent."

Thursday, July 23, 2009

A Piping Hot Cup Of STFU

Our Racial Commiserator in Chief needs to chill, not act the shill in a no win game of slap-tickle-hide-the-bigot. Obama needs to maintain piehole integrity until the facts of the case are clear.

The Harvard Idiot Savant Emeritus who was attempting to break into his own home and refused to supply police with proof that he actually resides in the premise needs to have his ass handed to him at the end of a stout length of cane.

No officer in his right mind is going to respond to a possible burglary in progress and then winsomely go about on other business because a possible suspect at the scene refuses to provide proper identification. Sure, we'll just take you at your word for it that you're not breaking into this residence. If Henry Gates had taken thirty seconds to produce his driver's license, this whole series of events would have never occurred. And if it actually had been a burglary in progress and the responding officers walked away without checking ID there would be hell to pay as screams of incompetent, uncaring racist cops would issue forth from this idiot and his race baiting play pals.

But the officer who responded to the call isn't accepting Obama's uninformed criticism.

A white police sergeant accused of racism after he arrested renowned black scholar Henry Louis Gates Jr. at his home insisted Wednesday he won't apologize for his treatment of the Harvard professor.

You can also listen to Sgt. James Crowley's statement

and then read the police report here.

It is a waste of the officer's time to think you are somehow "special" and the cops have to kiss your ass to get you to cooperate.

Guess again.

We don't. This is a sure recipe for the initiation of a technical process known as "jacking your dumbass up a few notches". Sometimes this process is necessarily accompanied by the concomitant application of "necessary and sufficient physical force".

I have applied these processes any number of times over a nearly twenty-five year span and they have always worked without fail. These invaluable processes also had an unintended collateral consequence - the person receiving this attention became smarter. This is usually the case with the exception of Harvard professors who think they are better than anyone else.

Now, Gates will devote the rest of his time wasting oxygen on this planet to the study of racial profiling. Hey, let's get it straight - fisherman fish where there is the greatest likelihood of catching a fish.

Read the 2007 federal UCR murder victimization and offender tables, it ain't honky crackers shooting up the 'hood. Although Blacks accounted for only 12.8% of the US population in 2007, they accounted for 49% of 2007 murder victims and 38% of all murder offenders. To shed a little more light on these charges of racism, look at the 2007 murders where the sex and race of both the victim and the offender are known. Blacks murdering whites is double the rate of whites murdering blacks (16% v. 8%).

Let me spell it it out anyone who is racially myoptic, let's do the math:
For the 3,587 white persons murdered in 2007, 566 (16%) were killed by a black offender.
For the 3,221 blacks who were murdered, 245 (8%) of the killers were white.

Victim/offender breakdowns within the same racial groups are not all that different.
White on white murders account for 81% of all white persons murdered in 2007.
Black on black murders account for 90% of all black persons murdered in 2007.

Obama stated that there must be a frank, honest discussion about racial matters in this country. I welcome those discussions. But first let us lay out the groundwork. Blacks are more likely to be murdered at a rate that is 658% greater than that of whites. And the overwhelming majority of those murders will be committed by persons of their own race.

The ratio of white homicide victims per 100,000 white people is 2.9 ... (6,948 white homicide victims out of a total 2007 white population estimated at 243,248,000).

The ratio of black homicide victims per 100,000 black people is 18.8 ... (7,316 black homicide victims out of a total 2007 black population estimated at 38,920,000).

This is completely unacceptable. This is beyond insanity.
Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson should be screaming from the rooftops for blacks to stop killing their brothers.

Stop the incessant beat of black rap and hip hop that is corrupting black youth - lovely black woman are not bitches and 'hoes. Stop the proliferation of unwed mothers and the destruction of families - for pity's sake don't have children until you and your SPOUSE have the ability to provide for them. Stop the flight of black youth from high school - the drop out rate is over 60% in some areas - and for the Love of Christ stop this damned victimization mindset. It's time for the black grown ups to finally act and take control of their culture.

But they don't. And neither does that useless piece of crap in the White House.

Instead they rail and race bait and make millions while their brothers die in the streets.

So much for an honest racial discussion from black leaders.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

On This Day In History

Fox News' Shep Smith ended his evening program with the following note:

On this day 26 years ago the coldest temperature on the planet was recorded at a remote Russian scientific outpost in Anarctica ... minus 129 degrees.

Only a few degrees colder than Hillary Clinton's bedroom.

Charlie's Pix

Charlie, the Chi-Town cop, sends some love.

First, this scenario could be rather anxiety provoking for animal lovers. A pickup truck driven by an obviously thoughtless person passes you on a busy highway, his neglected dog hanging on for dear life. You imagine you hear terrified howls from the poor animal. Allegedly that is exactly what happened.

Relax, it's a coyote that has passed through the hands of a talented taxidermist and then attached to a tailgate. I think that there should be two of them on either side of the tailgate with blinking directional buttholes. Their tails go up for the emergency blinkers...

Next, I doubt very much that Heath Ledger thought that his high chapperal butt-buddy romance would be the basis for a financial statement but it really is very appropriate.

Saddle up boys. Obama, his sidekick, Joe "Spend Ourseves Out Of Bankruptcy" Biden and the democrats are fixing to do to the American taxpayer what those cowboys were doing to each other under a big, starry Wyoming sky. Stirrups are optional.

Hopefully Obama and Biden will remove their spurs prior to mounting the taxpayer.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Obama Unites America

Doug Patton has an interesting read on the way Obama is affecting the American electorate; how his policies are bringing us together in a way that the Dems never expected - in opposition and revulsion.

I Was Wrong About Barack Obama
By Doug Patton
July 20, 2009

I have a confession to make. I was wrong about our president. He has been telling us that he is a uniter, not a divider, and I doubted him. I thought he would divide this country like no one who has ever held the office. Well, I was wrong, and I want to publicly apologize.

I thought Mr. Obama’s call for a cap and trade policy to combat “global warming,” with its provisions for tax increases and higher energy prices, would surely drive a wedge between us, but I was wrong.

I was sure that President Obama’s push for “the Employee Free Choice Act,” which opponents now have dubbed “the Employee Forced Choice Act,” would segregate labor against management like nothing we have seen in a generation, but I was wrong.

I could not imagine that the president’s insistence on a government-controlled universal health care scheme would not divide us one from another over an issue that is so crucial to our future, but I was wrong.

I predicted that what I perceived as cowardice in our president’s foreign policy would split this nation down the middle and create an intolerable divide between Americans, but I was wrong.
I was convinced that Barack Obama’s extreme views on the sanctity of human life would cause a tear in the fabric of society like no other issue since the Civil War, but I was wrong.

I had little doubt that what I saw as Obama’s hostility to the Second Amendment would create tremendous division over the issue, but I was wrong.

I just knew that this president’s penchant for “redistributing wealth” would cause a separation between rich, middle class and poor, but again, I was wrong.

And finally, I had always believed that when this president nominated judges who shared his radical philosophy of government, those nominations would divide the country.

Was I ever wrong! About all of it.

Barack Obama, just seven months into his only term as president, is beginning to bring this country together like no one since Jimmy Carter, the most incompetent president of the 20th Century.

People frown at the idea of raising taxes and energy costs in the middle of a recession with double-digit unemployment. Far from dividing Americans, Obama has created a rallying point on an issue all of us can understand.

On big labor, our fellow citizens could hardly be more united. When properly explained (a practice Obama detests, as evidenced by the fact that he insists Congress rush through legislation without even reading it), the American people hate the idea of depriving workers of their right to secret ballots in determining whether they become part of a union.

On issues of race, foreign policy, traditional marriage, the sanctity of innocent human life, the Second Amendment, property rights and so much more, poll after poll now shows that Barack Obama is uniting the American people against his radical, anti-American agenda.

But perhaps the area where this president is doing the best job of bringing people together is on the issue of universal health care. Americans instinctively know their country is not Europe, and they have no desire to become France. They understand that somehow someone is going to have to pay for all this “free” health care Obama keeps promising. They know that Obama-Care, like Hillary-Care before it, will do less, cost more and provide fewer choices. They grasp the idea that you cannot serve more people with fewer doctors and provide better care for less money. And they know that trying to jam all this through Congress in two weeks is the last refuge of a panicked administration losing its mesmerizing grip on the people.

So, thank you, Mr. President, for bringing us together. I never believed you could do it, and certainly not this soon. In less than a year and a half, you can unite us in a mid-term repudiation of your policies, and in three years and five months you can unite us all behind whomever your successor will be.
© 2009 by Doug Patton
Doug Patton is a freelance columnist who has served as a speech writer and public policy advisor for conservative candidates and elected officials. Since 2001, his work has appeared in newspapers across the country and on various Internet web sites. Readers can access the entire archives of Doug’s columns at, where he serves as a senior writer and state editor. His e-mail address is

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Best. Cartoon. Ever.

H/T to Charlie the cop who sent me this.
The Constitution already has something just for the f*ing moron occasion -it's called the 2nd Amendment.
Sorta like a fire axe you see every now and then stuck in a wall cabinet near a stairway exit.
Break glass and swing away.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Glad To Be Home

Due to an American Airlines jet malfunction in Dallas, we returned a day later than scheduled. We left San Jose on time but could not make the Dallas-Chicago connection. AA put us up overnight in Chicago and we landed in Syracuse about 11 am this morning. Something about the jet's windshield heater that would not work and hail storms over Illinois.

We were exhausted. There is something about travel that knocks you out; must be the stress and all the sitting around. We got to the Hyatt at 2200 local time, had a quick bite and collapsed. We were up since 0400.

But we had a good time visiting our daughter in Monterey.

Monterey/Central California is stunning; cold as all get out along the coast, but incredibly beautiful. Most of the time the temperature stayed in the mid-sixties. Funny, as long as you were out of the wind you could get sunburned and stay comfortable. When we left the Navy Lodge to drive to San Jose at 0520 hr it was 49 degrees; when we landed at Dallas it was 99.
I didn't take any photos when we went to our daughter's barracks at the Presidio as she said the guards get antsy about that.
Got some pix from Big Sur, Cannery Row (Monterey) and San Francisco. We traveled about sixty miles down the coast south from Carmel to see the following.

The pictures above and below are from the Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park. The estate of Lathrop and Helen Hooper Brown (the land was purchased as the Saddle Rock Ranch in 1924 and the house was built in 1940) was torn down in 1966 and the land donated to the State of California. The park is named after a close friend of Mrs. Brown, Julia Pfeiffer, the daughter of a Big Sur pioneer family.. The scenery is just incredible. Pictures simply cannot do it justice.


There are no more canneries in Monterey but there was a motorcycle race in the area over the weekend and the place was packed curb to curb with every motorcycle make and model imaginable.

There are all kinds of tourist shops and restaurants. At night the cops closed off the entire area for motorcycles. They even towed cars that the owners had left parked on the street.


What can I say about San Francisco... We froze our asses off.
Cold and windy, beggars and street freaks and street cars. To get here we drove a rental from Monterey to SF - about a 2.5 hour drive up CA Hwy 1. Going north on Hwy 1 was not as spectacular as the southbound trip but there were several areas of interest.

The wind was fierce. I had some trouble keeping the camcorder steady on top of this hill whilst photographing the Golden Gate. Right behind me is the remains of a 12 inch rifle battery that was installed after Pearl Harbor. It protected the entrance to SF Bay during WWII. I really should have taken a picture of it because it looked like it had barracks and fortifications at one time.

One other thing - the tourist sanitary accommodations at the bridge were atrocious; it resembled an Iraqi prison crapper. The only things missing were chains hanging from the ceiling and car battery jumper cables for my nuts. I was tempted to take a picture but it grossed me out.

This is City Hall; very impressive edifice.

Haight Ashbury - Yeah, there be hippies here. The girls wanted to go shopping at all the different places. There are a ton of specialty shops and little restaurants here as well as beggars and street hustlers trying to sell crap, they are all in their twenties. We got my grandson a camouflage jacket at a Army Surplus store on Haight St. We ate at the Pork Store Cafe - I must admit the food was good and the coffee (non-Starbucks) wherever I went was excellent.

This is on the Bay side. Those are florescent-yellow clad tourists taking a Segway ecologically approved tour through SF. It was like watching a flock of geese go by with brooms stuck up their asses. I would sooner die, truly.The Segway geese were behind me as I was taking this picture. There is a wharf down the road.

Alcatraz in the Bay from the back of a street car. We drove up one SF street in our rental Impala and I thought the car was going to flip over backwards. This city would be impossible in the Northeast where it snows for five months of the year. I have never seen hills like this with houses and apartments cheek-to-jowl coming out of the ground at almost a forty-degree angle to the road.

The people we met were very, very nice. Some lady gave my wife three all day street car passes at the ticket kiosk, just like that and they go for $11 a pop. We got lost several times and people went out of their way to help us get to where we needed to go. I just can't imagine taking a trolley to work everyday but these people seemed rather laid back compared to us twitchy northern types.

Everyone in SF that I approached agreed that this is typical summer weather. I was the only fool in SF wearing cargo shorts and no socks. Now I know why they stuck that prison out in the middle of the Bay.

We had a good time and now that I have finally had a decent night's rest (I got sick the day before we left Syracuse on 2 July and was still coughing and hacking today) even the missed flight due to the foul up in Dallas isn't all that bad in retrospect. It was such a joy to see my three daughters together again - you would not believe the silliness and laughing.

I really don't want to see SF again though, once is enough. Tony Bennet should sing that song "I Froze My Ass In San Francisco."

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Outta Here!

This probably will be my last post for the next week and a half.

Tomorrow morning we are all flying to San Jose, California, and then taking a rental to Monterey to visit with our daughter. Monterey is about 75 miles south of San Jose.

She is an Army Spec 4; her AIT is the Defense Language Institute in Monterey where she is studying Arabic. We are staying at the Naval Lodge about 3 miles away from DLI. She is a bit lonely right now and is very tired of being in school for so many years. She wants to get deployed but will not be through with all her training until late Spring next year.

We are all on pins and needles waiting to see her again. Her sisters are sooooo excited. The youngest (she is 17) has never flown. The middle girl (22) flew overseas twice in 2007, once to Cairo (January) and once to Israel (June).

Meghan Fox Got NOTHIN On My Honey

Meghan Fox, the beautiful actress/seductress/auto mechanic/ "Criminals are hawt!"/temptress in the Transformers movie is, in one way, built like my wife. They both have weird thumbs. Ms. Fox's right thumb is pictured below. My wife's hands are tiny. Our middle daughter's hands are even smaller, but her thumbs are not weird. When she was young, my wife used to hide her thumbs because she was embarrassed by their appearance.

But you know what? My wife and Ms. Fox are beautiful woman. Anyone who spends time obsessing over their thumbs when there are so much more attractive "attributes" that they possess is ... well, their cheese ain't centered on their cracker.

Get a life, huh?